Fountain attempts to drown passing woman

In my Online column this week,  I linked to the infamous “stupid woman falls in fountain as she walks and texts at the same time” video (click here and scroll down). Now the news is out that the aforementioned stupid woman is planning to sue the mall because no one came to her aid.

Well, of course they didn’t. They were all too busy laughing. Just like the rest of us. I mean, come on: if you’re stupid enough to be trying to text while walking and you just happen to fall into a fountain, it’s your own damn fault.

Maybe it’s her who should be sued. For polluting the fountain perhaps?

Or for being a fecking embarrassment to women everywhere.