(This is the Online column, written for The Southland Times)
I can’t believe Christmas has snuck up on me again, waving its tinselly bits at me mockingly as I wonder where the past 12 months have 
Have you written your letter to Santa yet (check: Dear Santa, I’ve been a very good girl this year and would like George Clooney’s phone number), decorated the tree (check: it’s 50cm tall and flashes when plugged in), sent out your Christmas cards (oops, forgot that one) and dropped plenty of hints at your loved ones about what you hope to unwrap on the big day (check: George Clooney’s phone number, music vouchers and/or alcoholic beverages)?
My plan for today’s column was a “12 Days of Christmas” list, starting with the 12 months of hot blokes featured in a risque Superman-themed calendar that’s being sold as a fundraiser.
Auckland man Ashley Thompson became tetraplegic in 2000 after falling on his neck but stemcell transplant treatment in India has given him some movement in his right foot.
It’s a fantastic start and continued fundraising will mean more treatments and, hopefully, more movement.
Anyway, I got sidetracked by the hot blokes in their underpants and couldn’t come up with anything else for the 12 Days of Christmas list.
Instead, here’s a wee warning about spam. Yes, the spammers are also loving the festive season, with the usual annual Christmas subject lines attempting to suck in the unsuspecting suckers.
According to the Symantec State of Spam monthly report, the top two seasonal spam subject lines for October and November were: Sales Receipt from Amazon and Sales Order from Walmart.
No-one ever said spammers were particularly smart, just persistent. And they rely on their victims being even less smart than they are. Walmart? We don’t have that store here in New Zealand but I still get spam mails from those evil little grinches trying to convince me to click their links.
My usual suspects haven’t abandoned me, though: I’m still getting regular emails offering pills and potions that will allow me to “blow her away with the size of your” … um, it’s probably best I not mention the appendage in question, this being a family newspaper and all.