Two old ladies were outside their nursing home one afternoon having a drink and a smoke, when it started to rain.
One of the old ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, pulled it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.
“What in the hell is that?” asked Maude. “A condom.” replied Mabel. “This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet.”
“Were did you get it?” asked Maude with interest.
“You get them at any pharmacy.” replied Mabel.
The next day, Maude hobbled into the local pharmacy and announced to the pharmacist she wanted a box of condoms. The pharmacist, obviously embarrassed, looked at her kind of strangely (she was after all over 80 years of age), but very delicately asked what brand of condom she preferred.
“Doesn’t matter Sonny,” she replied,”As long as it fits on a camel.”