Funny stuff

However you want to spell it (humor/humour), it’s the stuff that I find funny. That doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll agree with me but luckily it’s a free world.

Anonymity: you’re doing it wrong

Anonymity: you’re doing it wrong

At least they know how to spell anonymity, I suppose. Now perhaps they can look it up in a dictionary, because I’m pretty sure they don’t know what it actually means! Maybe Ms Reynolds wore a mask  while being interviewed.

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A Christmas poem

A Christmas poem

Twas the night before Christmas – Old Santa was pissed He cursed out the elves and threw down his list Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks I have a good mind to scrap the whole works I’ve busted my arse for damn near a year Instead of “Thanks Santa” – what do I hear The old lady bitches cause I work late at night The elves want more money – The raindeer all fight...

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Breaking news: Christmas policy

Breaking news: Christmas policy

Effective immediately, the following economising measures are being implemented in the “Twelve Days of Christmas” subsidiary: The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree, which never produced the cash crop forecasted, will be replaced by a plastic hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance; Two turtledoves represent a redundancy that is simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours could not be condoned. The positions are, therefore, eliminated; The three...

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And I shall call him …

And I shall call him …

The three wise men arrived to visit the child lying in the manger. One of the wise men was exceptionally tall and bumped his head on the low doorway as he entered the stable. ‘Jesus Christ!’ he exclaimed. Joseph said, ‘Write that down, Mary; it’s better than Clyde!’

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My word!

My word!

For all you lexophiles (lovers of words) 1. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tyred. 2. A will is a dead giveaway. 3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. 4. A backward poet writes inverse. 5. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion. 6. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. 7. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered. 8....

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Mein Fuhrer, the musical …

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How-to guide: cleaning the loo

How-to guide: cleaning the loo

Instructions for cleaning the toilet: Lift the lid on the toilet and fill it with 1/8 cup of animal shampoo. Take the cat in your arms and stroke it gently while slowly moving in the direction of the toilet. At a suitable moment, throw the cat into the toilet bowl and close the lid quickly and either stand or sit on the lid. The cat will now start the cleaning process and will generate...

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RWC funnies (some old, some new)

thumbs_upJust a few of the Rugby World Cup images doing the rounds. Some of them relate to that dark time when NZ was in a state of Cuplessness.

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Was that the wrong answer?

Who’d have thunk it: when a husband asks what you’d like to do with his body, apparently “identify it” isn’t the correct answer.

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This will make your eyes water

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