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Hold the front page: entitled brats have a whinge

As a born-and-bred Southlander and a proud Invercargillite, I’m not sure if I’m most pissed off at the whinging couple from Hamilton who didn’t like their Air New Zealand Mystery Break, or at the idiotic, pandering media for giving them their five minutes of fame. If you’ve been living under a rock, or perhaps hanging out at a Hamilton STI clinic (more on that later), you might have missed today’s “breaking news” on both...

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I’ve got a bone to pick with someone

I’ve got a bone to pick with someone

What’s that sound I hear? Probably my dear old mum spinning in her grave. Well OK, she was cremated so that analogy isn’t quite right, but you get my drift. Gotten … can you believe it? GOTTEN? The past tense of get is GOT, not gotten. It appeared in the headline of a travel story I clicked on the other day, and out of curiosity, I did a quick search on Stuff for “gotten”....

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… cos every little thing’s gonna be alt-right …

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The tribes of Facebook

The tribes of Facebook

Facebook users tend to fall into specific categories … which one are you? The Lurker: Never posts anything or comments on your post, but reads everything, and might make reference to your status if they see you in public. The Hyena: Doesn’t ever really say anything, just LOLs and LMAOs at everything. Mr/ Ms Popular: Has 4367 friends for NO reason. The Gamer: Plays Words With Friends, Mafia Wars, Bakes virtual cakes and stuff,...

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It’s time to vote YES, Aussie

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Given the impending postal survey on gay marriage across the ditch, now’s probably a good time to revisit a speech by an obviously well-raised young man who shows that sexual orientation has nothing to do with your value as a person. It just baffles me that in 2017, we’re still having this debate. Everyone should be entitled to equal rights. It’s a no-brainer, really. Do the right thing, Aussie. Vote YES.

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A blast from the not-so-musical past

I’m not sure how it happened, but while minding my own business and surfing the net the other day I stumbled across this old gem from 2012: Lisa Gail Allred’s 3 Second Rule. Holy crap, I’d forgotten just how awful it was. Anyway, now that it’s stuck in my brain AGAIN (dammit), I think it’s only fair that I should inflict it on someone else. You’re welcome!

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Act now … or tomorrow … or next week

Act now … or tomorrow … or next week

Are you a procrastinator? I am to a minor degree, but I think that’s just human nature: we’re not always keen to do things that are hard work or a bit boring. Apparently though, it’s something we should cure by taking a course. An online course, in fact. Get The Darned Thing Done – How To Beat Procrastination In 14 Days was given a somewhat glowing review by a reporter for the Mail Online last...

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Zuckerberg would be an improvement

Zuckerberg would be an improvement

It seems there’s been some speculation that Facebook boss Mark Zuckerberg is planning to have a crack at running for president, but the wealthy tech guru has poured cold water on the rumours. The rumours came about after he hired an ex-Whitehouse photographer to be his personal photographer, and also publicly renounced his atheism. Because it seems being an orange buffoon is acceptable when it comes to being leader of the free world, but...

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For that ‘hard to shop for’ person?

For that ‘hard to shop for’ person?

So Christmas is getting ever closer, and we all have that one person on our list who is nearly impossible to shop for. Well have I got news for you! From the “things you didn’t know you needed but can find on the internet” comes a product called My New Pink Button, which has made a few sales on Amazon. I’m glad you asked (although you might wish you’d kept that question to yourself once I’ve explained).  My New Pink Button is a “temporary dye to restore the youthful pink color back to your labia”. Yes folks, it’s lipstick for your girly bits. It’s currently out of stock so sorry, if you were keen to try a new shade for summer you might have to wait a while. I think I might need a cup of tea and a lie down.

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