Man sleeping on church pew.
A woman who is constantly embarrassed by her husband falling asleep in church goes to the priest to ask for help.
The priest says, “Look love, if he falls asleep again, poke him with this hat pin. I’ll nod to you as a signal to poke him”.
The woman agrees to the plan.
So Sunday rolls around and sure enough, good old Mr Jones nods off again. The priest notices and asks, “Who is our saviour?” then nods to Mrs Jones.
She pokes her husband, and he wakes up and shouts, “Jesus Christ!”
The priest, pretending to be impressed, says, “Very good!”
A full three minutes later, Mr Jones is asleep again. The priest again notices, and asks, “What is the name of Jesus’ father?” before nodding at Mrs Jones again.
She pokes her husband, who screams, “GOD!” at the top of his lungs.
The priest again congratulates Mr Jones on his alertness and continues with the sermon.
However, during the sermon, he begins nodding enthusiastically, which Mrs Jones mistakes for a poking signal.
The priest then says, “And what did Eve say to Adam after she gave him his 99th child?” the priest nods.
The mistaken Mrs Jones pokes her husband, and he shouts, “If you poke that fucking thing into me one more time, I’ll snap it in half and shove it up your arse!”