So, are we excited about Christmas yet? It’s sneaking up on us now and will be here before we know it so enjoy the last week where you might possibly enjoy some gentle sanity before Christmas week arrives to slap you around the ears like an annoying big brother.
Can you tell I’ve got big brothers? Four of them?
But I digress.
Christmas. It’s just about here. I have my own special methods of getting organised for the big day (generally, they involve Drambuie or wine and doing all my Christmas shopping on December 23) but one of the things I can never get under control is the whole Christmas card thing. I always have good intentions, planning on buying, writing and posting the little beasties by mid-December but I only ever seem to get as far as step 2. This year I haven’t even managed to get to step 1. In my own defence, I’d like to say that I’ve been incredibly busy at work (truly, even a trip to the loo involves planning … I usually tack it on to a trip to the printer, can’t go wasting an entire 4 minutes out of the batcave office with nothing more than a comfort stop. But I digress. Again).
I found these wonderful Christmas cards online. Perfect for those suffering festive overload, I think. The cheery wee seasonal message inside the card reads “Merry Fucking Christmas”.
Just US$15 for a set of 5. Awesome!
“Get more out of your batteries”
Okay, so maybe I’ve got a filthy mind (well, I guess the maybe part of that sentence doesn’t really need to be there) but it did strike me as rather thoughtful of Stuff to be offering some pre-Christmas hints on how to keep the battery-powered toys chugging along a bit longer.
Speaking of mechanical boyfriends:
A woman walks into a sex toy store and asks where the vibrators are. “Come this way,” the woman behind the counter says, gesturing with her finger.
“If I could come that way, I wouldn’t need the vibrator, would I?” the woman responds.
PS: Okay, the Stuff headline was actually quite innocent but still …