Cartoon from Toothpaste for Dinner site
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(This is the Online column, written for The Southland Times)
Valentine’s Day might be over but the net is still littered with reminders of the sappy event.
For any single women out there who truly believe they are missing something in their lives, I’ve found a virtual husband to give you a taste of what married life is like.
That site got me thinking about how much easier it would be to take the virtual relationship option. The first thing you’ll need is a virtual boyfriend. You can find him at Virtual Boys. How’s that for perfect, a man with an off switch.
Of course, you’ll want to go out with your new man. Maybe you could pop out for a drink at the virtual bar — just watch out for that virtual barmaid, she’s a bit of a flirt.
Don’t forget that the smokers can’t light up in a bar these days so you’ll need a virtual smoke break.
If all goes well in the new relationship and you’re still an item by Easter, you can have some virtual chocolate.
So, you’ve been dating your virtual man for a while and the next thing you know he turns up with some virtual flowers and pops the virtual question.
No, not THAT question, the marriage one. Its time to plan your virtual wedding. You could get hitched at Chapel of Love. Follow that up with a virtual honeymoon.
If you’re ready to start a family there’s a virtual baby waiting for you. Add to the family with a virtual pet and you’re set.
Your new virtual family can even go on a virtual outing to the virtual zoo.
But what if things in your virtual world aren’t going so well? Calm down, pop some virtual bubble wrap to ease your stress, then get a virtual divorce).
Virtually painless.